a hero in zombie infested ponylands
by protecter22
Summary: what happens when a human that's been alone all his life but is left with only food water guns clothes and all that is taken to a world where 6 ponies need his help to cleanse it.


"I was alone abandoned by my parents and left to fend for myself. but when a portal opened near my makeshift home and the gun cabinet I got the guns out and got dressed in heavy weaved clothing. I walked right through the portal and was face to face with a pony or 6 of them. they eyed me with curious eyes until the lavender one started talking. my mouth dropped after hearing that but quickly pulled together. I opened my mouth and said hello to them that made look at me in pure fascination and joy. the lavender one walked up and told me her name and why she opened the portal. I was scared shitless because they brought me here to clear their world of an infection that turned ponies into zombies. I said I don't know where we are or where the exit is. but before I could say anything a monstrous roar was heard and the cyan one screamed TANK which I pulled out my plasma rifle. (I was born in the year 2080 and when I was 10 I could shoot like a fucking boss.) I looked through the thermal scope and sure enough a big mother fucking zombie the size of a tank was headed directly at me. I started shooting that bitch and when he got close he fucking hit me which pissed me off. I put my rifle up and went close combat. I walked to him he walked to me once we were close enough I started circling and he did the same I stopped where he stood same for him in my spot. I was just getting the plan through my head. and bingo he charged first which I had a battle staff out now and was dodging like a pro hitting him when he missed. 10 minutes into the fight he was on his knees so I pulled out my katana and sliced his head off. I was wheezing and coughing up blood from the last hit he managed. but I was okay. the yellow pony ran up to me and removed my shirt and started raping me in medical gauze and putting ointment on my open cuts. I thanked her and told her to get the others. she nodded but didn't move from my side so I walked to where the others were and as always she was still by my side. the others looked at my bare chest and saw raw it was they called me the slayer or some shit but they told me their names in the end. but good things only last so long because a massive tongue raped around me and I was about to be zombie food until something came to mind the tongue raped around me clockwise so I to go with the flow I started spinning clockwise like tongue did to rap around me and bingo I was free and the thing looked like damn smoker or some shit from what ever that game was called. he tried again but I grabbed the tongue mid flight and yanked the fucker causing the bitch to fall to his death. but that triggered a goddamn hoard and every pony got behind me I pulled out my gravity hammer and did a fucking ground pound that launched any nigger caught in the shockwave to the moon. I was yet again the hero. but celebrating would have to wait. the ponies looked at me in horror as I didn't give two fucks about letting these things live. but the look of horror turned to one of understanding. I was about to say something when a goddamn hooded zombie leaped on me and started ripping my guts out. but because zombies are stupid I rolled so I was on top and beat the fuck out that bitch until his head flew off and went splat against a wall. I hunched over with my arm covering the wound. I said I don't think I can last much more of this shit. but of course a light came out of god knows where and I was magically healed. than another light appeared and revealed a princess she looked at me with fascination and said the zombie menace has been eradicated. I said that's not how it works the zombie vires must have went dormant and killed the undead which means someone is still infected. she said I assure you if that is the case guards will be watching the ponies from now on. I said that is good but I want you to take blood samples daily not from these six girls though. I can handle that. she nods and walks off. something tells me I will be here for a while.

to be continued


End file.
